The Moon and the Sun

It took me five years of marriage to realize that Jake never proposed to me because he'd already proposed to someone else overseas.

He was late to our wedding because he was still hoping she’d change her mind.

Later, he told me he loved me, but by then I was already walking away.

A person who belongs to the moon doesn't deserve the sun.

1

After our son, Leo, fell asleep, I went into Jake’s office and sat at his desk.

I stayed there a long time, until my neck was stiff and the clock hit two in the morning.

After a lot of hesitation, I typed in a series of numbers and easily unlocked his computer, and the encrypted folder labeled "My Star."

It was full of pictures of Chloe – Jake's ex.

I couldn't even cry out loud, afraid of waking the baby I’d just put to bed.

Silently, I scrolled to the bottom, a spectator watching my husband's love affair with his "star" through four years of college, the endless breakups and makeups.

At three AM, I was aimlessly scrolling on my phone, torn between keeping quiet for Leo’s sake and waiting for morning to pretend nothing happened, or smashing the laptop on Jake's face and screaming at him, asking him why he did this to me.

My thumb hovered over an email, a picture sent two hours ago from an unknown number.

In the photo, Chloe, the woman Jake had always pined for, leaned on his shoulder. Meanwhile, he was texting me:

"Late night at the office, hon. You and Leo get some sleep, don’t wait up."

The same casual tone as always. I stared at it until that number sent another email:

"Jake and I have been seeing each other for a long time. There's an encrypted file on his computer, the password's my birthday: 0319. If you’re willing to let us be together after you see it, divorce Jake. If not, I’ll still fight for my happiness – I met him first, after all."

Today is 3/19, also Leo’s first birthday.

Before the party, Jake got a call, said it was a work emergency, and left me at the restaurant alone, holding our baby while greeting friends.

Chloe claims she met Jake first. But I'd known him for years before her.

My aunt was best friends with Jake's mom. When I was little and my parents were busy with work, I often stayed at my aunt’s place.

One weekend, my aunt said, "Sunny, if you can get Jake to talk to you while we’re at his house, I'll buy you that Power Ranger backpack you want!"

Jake was three years older than me. When he was already talking, I was still pining after a Power Ranger backpack.

Back then, Jake was quiet and withdrawn, always sitting alone in the corner reading, not talking to anyone. If someone came near him, he would snap his book shut and put up walls to protect himself.

I promised my aunt I’d get him to talk.

So, I sat next to him and asked, "Can I read the same book as you?"

His fingers paused slightly, and although he didn't say anything, a few minutes later he slid the book halfway over to me.

I glanced over my shoulder, and my aunt and Jake's mom were peeking through the d...