disheartened

I found a used condom and a lacy thong in the bathroom trash. I hadn’t been intimate with Jason in over a year, and the thong definitely wasn’t mine. I was about to call him when I saw a post on his “little sister’s” Instagram. There he was, head bowed, tenderly kissing the foot of his secretary. I closed my phone, swallowed the lump in my throat, and went on with my day. It was Jason who finally noticed something was off. His eyes were red-rimmed when he asked, “Don’t you care that I’m messing around with someone else?”

1.

I was brushing my teeth when I spotted the black, lacy thong in the bathroom trash can. A used condom lay on top. I froze. Jason and I hadn’t had sex in a year. And I was way too practical for lingerie like that. It could only mean one thing: Jason had brought a woman home while I was at Sarah's last night.

I grabbed my phone to call him, but saw a text message instead. "Busy today. Handle anything you need to yourself, okay?"

Today was my mom’s death anniversary. Every year, Jason went with me to visit her grave. I’d even confirmed with him this morning that he’d be there. He’d said yes.

But now he was saying he couldn’t come. What was so important? Then I saw Heather, his “little sister,” had updated her Instagram. I’d added her after he’d brought her over to the house before.

My blood ran cold. The photo was taken in a hotel room. Jason was bent over, holding Heather’s foot, his lips pressed against her instep. His eyes were filled with… adoration. The caption read, "He says he loves everything about me."

In that instant, the last flicker of love I felt for him died.

2.

I sat in the living room, staring at my phone and my mom's picture. Before she passed, she’d made Jason promise to take care of me. He’d knelt by her bed, holding her hand, and vowed, “Mom, you can rest easy. I’ll always take care of Emily.”

But not long after she was gone, he started staying out late, coming home reeking of perfume, his neck and chest covered in tell-tale marks. Every time I’d cried, asking him if there was someone else. He’d snap, “You’re going stir-crazy being a housewife, always suspicious! I was at a work event. Of course I’m going to pick up scents.”

I snapped out of it, gathered my things, and drove to the cemetery. I placed the flowers on her grave and knelt, telling her everything would be okay, that Jason was treating me well. It was a lie, of course. I just wanted her to rest peacefully.

By the time Jason called, it was early evening. "Where are you?" He’d forgotten. Of course he’d forgotten. He was too busy entertaining his “little sister.” Bitterness welled up inside me, but I forced myself to stay calm. "It’s Mom’s anniversary. I’m at the cemetery."

Silence. Then, "I’m so sorry, Emily. I was completely swamped and it slipped my mind. I’ll come get you."

3.

Twenty minutes later, Jason’s car pulled up. It was drizzling, and my hair was damp. He didn’t get out, just told me to hurry up.

Once I was in the passenger ...